the week that past

i am so thankful for a new week! those close to me will know why! first off something that happened a month ago which i had delt with and moved on comes up and gets blown way out more than necessary. to have me crying hysterically and hyperventilating something had to happen! when people do not believe what you tell them because they have others about your behaviour and believe them over you, that really gets to me. I do not lie especially about the things that they think. When people think you are someone that you certainly are not also irritates me i should not have to prove myself to anyone. Only God. What happened needed to happen in my books. Since that night i am the woman God wanted and needed me to be. So people really need to get over everything and move on. I know God has called me to be a leader and i need to just be me on order to do that. I do not need to behave in a certain way because i already behave like that if if makes any sense! so now ive got that off my chest. I then find out one of my childhood best friends has passed away at 17. I last talk to her sunday and by Monday night she is brain dead. How does this happen? have no idea. I am not able to make it to her funeral so when that is happening i will be saying goodbye over here no matter what is going on. Lauren was a big part of my life and i will never forget her. and to top it all off im getting sick! talk about me being on fire for God or what. You see the devil knows i am such a threat to him that he will doo whatever it takes to budge me off my walk with God but thats not going to happen anymore! it might of in the past but no longer. I am ever so drivin that nothing is going to stop me from achieving what God has in store for me. I know who i am in God and the people that matter should know who i am and trust me enough to believe me and to not look down on me or judge me for one stupid night. This night has made me who God wants me to be and alot of people also believe this as they can see the change within me. I honestly pray for a couple of people who mean the world to me to also see this.